It was after months and weeks and days and with a complicated series of pulleys and nets that I finally trapped the Butterfly in the dark of a movie theater. It was countless bars and beers and finally she was watching a movie with me. And it was Alexander Payne's pitch-perfect Sideways, what flickered in her big eyes.

A mix of that a) she was actually there, and b) I had already seen the film, made it hard to pay attention. Just like a couch, just like lounging and being high, I wanted to touch her the whole time. Did in fact. And in a moment of life imitating art imitating life, just as Paul Giamatti's Miles makes a dating dud of himself --"Uh, I've been getting into Rieslings, rieslings...you like riesling."-- I old-school slung my arm around her shoulders. But before it got around her shoulders, its elbow stopped off at her eye. CRACK! And before I could kiss it and apologize I just wanted to laugh.

It was so cliche. My cracking her in the eye on our first trip to the cinema. It was so perfectly real.

Just like Sideways.